brave losses


I am so grateful for this small space of connection and abundance. In innumerable ways this little blog and your support has literally kept my life afloat. No exaggeration. As I've been working to fully get on my feet as a single mom, every ounce of love coming from here feels like a daily whisper of "keep going", which has become my steady, quiet mantra. 

There have been so many things to work through, parenting schedules, holiday traditions and the way we celebrate birthdays and other life milestones, health insurance, the unclear division of in-laws and friends, as well as gathering all the stuff one needs to make a life. I took me several months to simply get a real bed, and I still always forget I no longer own a cheese grater. In all the tiny and immense ways it has taken to break down and rebuild, you being here along for some of it is a gift. 

As my work has turned a big corner too, I'm in that transition phase where it feels like it's all built on pure faith. It was like this when I started talking about sex in my work several years ago. After that first newsletter I sent out with a whiff of what was to come, I lost almost half my followers. Still, I knew I had to keep going, and I rebuilt my work on vulnerable truth-telling. Now as I dive deeper into my embodiment work, which has directly grown from the work I did around owning my sexuality, it feels like a similarly new and vulnerable place. Not everyone is willing or able to be in these tender conversations with me, and that's totally ok. I just know what work I have to do to keep moving forward in my most honest direction. It felt like this with my separation too, cleaving away half my life, despite the fear, to make space for more truth, more freedom, more love, I knew would be on the other side. I haven't quite reached that shore, but I am so munch closer in so many ways. 

What I've realized along the way is that these brave losses are utterly invaluable as well. So I breathe deep and keep going, shedding everything but soul.




2 comments:

  1. I am so happy that you are holding fast to your truth with integrity - in spite (or maybe) because of it all.

    I am about to release something into the world this week (in French), and it feels terribly frightening, and so very exciting at the same time. It feels like I am "exposing" myself... and hoping that it does not cause harm in the legal battle I am in right now.

    I don't know about you, but it feels like there is both a sense of expansion and anxiety co-habiting together since the Full Moon-Eclipse of last weekend. Some sort of urgency to release what we have held close to our heart for a long time... perhaps like a bird who is ready to leave the nest, full of hope and with wings ready to stretch for the pure joy of flying and the freedom of emboying all that we are.

    Thank you for your courage. You are such an inspiration to me, and a light bearer, unto embracing our truth of the moment. Welcoming the questions. Being ok in the space of "not knowing".

    Keep shining on brightly, Love Warrior.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your new site looks beautiful and like such a true expression of YOU! I'm totally cheering you on in every way. I saw this quote today and thought I'd share it with you: "Bravery is rarely about doing something bold. The bravest act is often a quiet internal moment when we sit in great discomfort, close our eyes, and gently whisper, I will stay."

      Delete